Moments

Boy, it has been awhile hasnt it? It seems like the oldest excuse in the book but, life is busy ladies and gents. I often think of my poor lonely blog and honestly have had a bit of writers block. That all changed this Sunday as I sat in church. Before we took communion a man stood up and talked about moments. Moments in life that stick in our hearts and minds forever. Your childs birth, the first time they talk/walk/speak, your wedding day, your first real job, 911, and the moment Jesus died for me. What a very amazing moment that was. Without that moment I couldnt have experienced all my other moments. I guess I never thought of it that way until then. While going about my day after Sunday morning service I continued to think about moments that are burnt into my memory. The good ones and the bad ones. Then in the midst of this lesson that I carried with me outside of Sundays sermon, I got to experience another beautiful moment:
My oldest daughter Kelbie is going through a rough time these last few months and I have told her over and over how beautiful, smart, fun etc. she is and that she doesnt deserve to have anything but the best. I have tried to brand those things into both of my children. I want them to know their worth. Nonetheless, she is a teenage girl and what her mama says goes in one ear and out the other as she continues to deal with her little tradegy in the best way she knows how. So Sunday night she comes out of her room with tears in her eyes and the saddest face ever. I think to myself for one breif moment, if she is crying because she has to clean her room I may just lose it. I brace myself and I ask her what is wrong and of course my answer is "nothing". Well, that just wasnt good enough for me so I pry and pry like mothers do and finally she says "You know whats wrong mom and I dont want to talk about it" so as she wishes I give her space. I walk outside to take the trash out and come back in and I can hear her sobbing. I walk around the corner and see the most amazing thing. There she is all wrapped up in Randy's arms while she cries over a broken heart. Now I know most moms would see this as a tender moment but, for me it was more. In that moment I realized that's exactly what little girls need. A daddy to tell them they are beautiful, smart and funny. A man to tell them that life does go on and that not all boys are going to hurt you. A man to let her know that she is loved beyond anything in the world and that she is worth more than anything. A man to give her a positive look into her future. Kelbie nor I have ever had that "moment" before. Im not sure she realized it to be a moment just yet. I pray that she will remember it forever. She doesnt know the comfort of a father or she didnt until then. What a beautiful moment. What a beautiful man!


Tdazzle

OH Lord Have Mercy!!! I love Christmas

I know I know everyone says they "LOVE" Christmas. I actually really do. I hate the stress the world has created and I fight daily as a single mom not to get caught up in that mess of stress! I however love every other thing there is about Christmas!!! Its sparkly, glittery, colorful and cold. I love snuggling in a warm house ( I have to imagine a fireplace for now), I love the winter food, the parties, the friends and family, the baking, the singing, Jesus birthday ( most importantly) but, oh Christmas Tree I love me some Christmas decorating. I cant stop. Its a bit ridiculous and I know my Elf ways have to be on Boy Wonder, my kids and most of my friends nerves but, I cant get enough! I decorate, I blog about decorating, I decorate some more, I eat, sleep and breath for Christmas decorations!!! So here are a few things I have created this season. I got a late start but, am planning to start early next year and try to make some Christmas money by selling my wreaths and such...





This is my very merry holly jolly Christmas Tree. I love it!




This is my wintery wreath I made for my most favorite friend Autumn. We decided we need to spray the entire thing with snow so I will post a new photo when we get around to it!!!



This is my glamourous red and gold wreath I made for my fabulous friend Rachelle.

Finally this is my wreath. The first one I made this year. I do believe it needs more ribbon or something but, it makes me think of " The Grinch" its really fun dontcha think!

I have made another wreath that is more of a candy theme and will take a pic of it tonight!!!


I want to make a glittery "Happy Birthday Baby Jesus" one next but, it may have to wait until next year!


So I guess Im off to make more Christmas!

Merry Merry Christmas!!!

Pearl's Hope & Tanya's Christmas Wish

Pearl’s Hope and Tanya’s Christmas Wish



It’s that season again. The time where we all wonder how in the world we are going to get everything bought for our kids, family and friends. A time when we stress about whether we have given enough or gone overboard in some cases. The hustle and bustle are 2 of my favorite things about this holiday season but, my absolute favorite thing about this season is “giving”. I love to see the look on my children’s faces on Christmas morning when they open gifts. I love buying individual gifts for my friends and family and knowing that I bought them something that fits their personality. The truth is I am an Elf or I wish I was. I love the smell, the feeling, the stress and the joys of Christmas. The day after Thanksgiving (if I can stand to wait that long) my house looks like Santa Clause threw up every where!! I am that girl that goes overboard on decorating. So you get my point I love Christmas.



There is one thing that brings sadness to my “oh so jolly heart” this time of year. I hate to see anyone go without. I have a huge place in my heart for single moms who struggle but, it hurts me even more during this time of year. I have been where they are and I have hated this season because I couldn’t do for my kids what I wanted. There have been times I couldn’t have done anything at all without the people who saw me struggle and came to my rescue. I have had someone put $300 dollars in my mailbox at work, some dear friends (a couple named Tracy & Gary) have given me money to help with my Christmas for my kids, my mom and now Boy Wonder’s family have always made sure my kids had the very best Christmas and I could never explain how much it means to me. Every year for about 4 yrs now I have tried to donate to something like Christmas Angel Tree, Coats for Kids, or maybe for someone I know is struggling to make Christmas happen for their kids. While I know that Christmas isn’t just about gifts and Santa Clause, I also know the horrible feeling you get when you cant have Christmas for your children. So this year I have looked and looked, thought, and pondered of what I could do to help people enjoy this season as much as I do (if that’s possible).



Here is my Christmas Wish this year. There is an organization called Pearl’s Hope in Tulsa. It was established in 2008 when Pearl Opel Thorpe had a vision, a hope, really, that a shelter for women and their children could become a reality in Tulsa. Pearl had visited many shelters for woman in the Tulsa area and had realized that these shelters would accommodate homeless woman but, not their children (gasp, can you imagine). While visiting one she thought “"My hope is that someday, I will be able to provide for a place like this, but one that would be able to keep the women and their children together." With the help of a few other organizations Pearl’s Hope became a reality in September 2008. Sadly, most shelters do not accept children even if they are still in the custody of their mother. These children are torn from their mothers and placed with friends, family and often times foster care. For me, to think of my child being torn from me because I couldn’t afford a home would be devastating and I know from experience what being taken from your mom can do to a child. Because of the size of Pearl’s Hope facility they are able to take woman with as many as 5 children. Pearl’s Hope is just one department supported by “United Methodist Circle of Care” but, it is the one that spoke to my heart the loudest. I have called and spoke to the staff at Pearl’s Hope and have found out what some of their specific needs are. My wish is that my facebook friends, friends and family will take time out and help me provide some of the needs for these single woman and their children who live at Pearl’s Hope. Below is a list of needs.



Non-food needs for personal hygiene: Diapers, soap, toothpaste, toilet paper, deodorant, lotion, disposable razors, personal female products, baby wipes, powder, shampoo & conditioner

Household items: Dish and laundry detergent, paper towels, paper napkins, foil/plastic wrap

Non-perishable pantry food items: Canned fruit, canned vegetables, tuna, canned meat, bottled/canned juices, pasta & sauce, beans, rice soups, cereal, baby formula, baby food

Perishable items always needed, such as: Fresh fruit & Vegetables, bread, potatoes, eggs, milk, cheese

Gas Cards for the woman to get to and from work

Gift Cards for woman for Christmas to places such as Bath & Body, Target, and Wal-Mart etc.

Small Kitchen Appliances

Kids Clothes (ages newborn – 11)

Christmas Gifts for Children ages newborn to 11

Christmas Gifts for moms

Any housing items that could be used in a small apartment (blankets, pillows, décor, kitchen utensils, bathroom supplies, etc)

No candles allowed in apartments.



Let’s get creative and help out people less fortunate than ourselves. Get with friends, churches, schools and other organizations and come up with ways to help make this Christmas what Christmas is really all about, giving and spreading God’s love to all of his children (especially the children). Please feel free to contact me on Facebook, my email @ thunt@scissortailenergy.com or by phone 918-798-7587 with any questions or if you need for me to come pick up your donation. I truly appreciate all of your help.

Also, if you would like to check out Pearl’s Hope or any other program at “United Methodist Circle of Care” go to their website at http://www.circleofcare.org/site/05community/overview.html



The joy of brightening other lives, bearing each others' burdens, easing other's loads and supplanting empty hearts and lives with generous gifts becomes for us the magic of Christmas. -WC Jones

Quote & Photography Post

love isn't perfect. it isn't a fairytale or a storybook, and it doesn't always come easy.
love is overcoming obstacles, facing challenges, fighting to be together, holding on, and
never letting go. it is a short word, easy to spell, difficult to define, and impossible to live
without. love is work, but most of all, love is realizing that every hour, every minute, and every
second was worth it because you did it together




it's funny how we set qualifications for the right person to love, when deep in
your heart, you know that the person we truly love will always be an
exception.



maybe true love is a decision. you know, a decision to take a chance
with somebody, to give to somebody without worrying whether they'll
give anything back if they're going to hurt you, or if they really are the
one. maybe love isn't just something that happens to you. maybe it's
something you have to choose.



twenty years from now i am gonna look back and remember that you were the one
person who could turn every frown into a smile with a few simple words; that person
who lifted my head when i was losing faith in myself; that one person who carried
tears on his shoulders after every fight, every break up, every death; that one person who accepted every decision i made, that one person who knew who i really was; that one person that made the biggest difference in my life, my best friend.



You've got to have someone who loves your body. Who doesn't define you, but sees you. Who loves what he sees. Who you don't have to struggle to be good enough for."


This is what I know about love, that it is tested every day, and what is not renewed is lost. One either chooses to care more or to care less. Once the choice is to care less, then there is no stopping the momentum of goodbye.


And maybe it didn't matter so much
whether he took the step or I did.
All I knew was that he was there.

The Touchy Subject Challenge

'The Touchy-Subject Challenge'

Don't worry i'm not diving into another challenge just yet - i'm actually going to post this all in one go. I loved this challenge simply because it covered subjects which with some people can often strike a nerve and that is not my intention but it also gives me the opportunity to express my views and basically have a good old rant, which people who read my posts know i do that alot :')

Day 1 – Do you believe in God?/What religion are you?

I absolutely believe in God. I have been through so much in my life starting at a very early age and I cant remember a time that I didnt believe in him. I never had to be persuaded to not only believe in him but, I have always loved and needed him. Im not perfect nor am I anywhere near where I should be in my walk with him however, I know he walks with me and that his love and his power are enough to overcome anything in this world or in any other world. I belong to a baptist church and I believe most things that the baptist believe.

Day 2 – Do you believe in an afterlife? What do you believe happens when you die?

There is one thing I am certain of and that is there is heaven and there is hell. Going any farther into that Im not sure exactly what I believe. I know some say if you dont live everyday for christ or lets say you raped someone or murdered someone some believe you will go to hell. For very selfish reasons I would love to say that I believe that but, on the other hand I dont believe that I serve a selfish God. I believe any man no matter how rotten can be forgiven and go to heaven. I think the only one way ticket to hell is to deny Christ. And that my friends is something I could never do. I also believe there is one person who gets to pick and choose who gets into heaven and some people should feel darn lucky that Im not that person.


Day 3 – Are you proud to be from whatever country you are from?

I was born in Canada and I know nothing about that country. I have lived in the United States since I was 2. Right now I am having a hard time being patriotic because these damn people want even give me a US Passport however, there are great things about this country and I am proud to live here.

Day 4 – What is your view on gay marriage?

Before I enlighten you with my opinion let me just say. The bible says its wrong so its wrong.

Ok, now my opinion is that I have no right to tell anyone who they can love, have sex with or marry. Its not my business. If you love someone you love them.

Day 5 – Do you think sex before marriage is okay?

Again its says its a no no in the bible but, me Im absolutely ok with sex before marriage. Im not sure I could marry someone without knowing what Im working with if you know what I mean. Now sleeping around here and there and everywhere well thats just slutty and no good!

Day 6 – What are your views on love? Do you think it’s real? Do you think we only experience one love per lifetime? Does everyone have a soul mate?

My views on love - I have seen amazing love, I have seen toxic love, I have seen innocent love and I have seen pure true love. My views on love right now are that LOVE takes a ton of stinkin work and Im not sure Im up for that task but, at the same time to love someone completely and to know that person loves you back is the best feeling in the world.

Do I think love is real? I think love can be real but, I think the world has corrupted its meaning and its capacity with lust, sex, and worldly things. I think you can have real love but, I also think its a very rate thing.

Do I think you only experience love one time? I think the first person you love is a lucky son of a gun. That person gets your entire heart when its complete, unbruised and unbroken. I think your first love is the most innocent and exciting love you will ever have. I think when/if it ends your first love gets that part of your heart no matter how many years go by. I think you have no control over it because you dont have to give your heart permission to be someone elses. So the pattern goes on and on and yes, I believe you can fall in love and love someone again I just think you can never love them with that part of your heart you gave to someone else therefore, your second, third and fourth love (if you have that many) dont get your entire heart.

Does everyone have a soul mate? I believe in soul mates. I believe there are different types of soul mates for instance, My best friend Jes is my soul mate. I swear I loved her before I ever knew her. She was somewhere in my soul before she ever came into my life. I think I have found another soul mate and her name is Autumn. We are almost the same dang person to the point of creepiness. Im not sure if maybe my soul is open to finding my soul mate as far as my spouse or lover goes. Maybe I have found one but, I dont believe we only have one. That would just be silly!

Day 7 – Do you want to get married and/or have kids?

Been there done both...I dont want anymore kids and the unhealthy scared out of my mind part of me says "HELL NO" to marriage ever again but, there is a healthy part of me that would love to be married again. I just want to be in a healthy relationship with someone who gets me. Someone that loves me more than anything and someone that makes me laugh and stands beside the decisions I make even if they dont agree and someone who knows how to put me in my place without being disrespectful. I first have to learn how to be all those things before I can expect a man to do them for me and Im not there yet or maybe I just havent found the man for me.

Day 8 – Do you think any drugs should be legalized? Do you think there should be an age for drinking?

There is an age for drinking and Im ok with that age.
As far as drugs go no I dont think they should be legalized.


Day 9 – Pro-life or prochoice?
I’m kinda of 50/50 with this, because myself personally would be pro life, i could never abort my own child - to me having an abortion is just killing your own baby, and that something i don’t think i could live with myself for doing.
But, i can also understand why people do, so i wouldn’t hold judgement against people for it, because at the end of the day people have there reasons for doing it.
There only reasons i consider it as a option is if :
1. The pregnancy was the result of the rape, i wouldn’t want anyone to have to have that constant reminder.
2. If continuing that pregnancy could harm your life i.e. an etopic pregnancy

Day 10 – What do you think about straightxedge?
I had to google this because i’ve never heard that before and wikipedia told me
"Straight Edge refers to a subculture of hardcore punk, which was a direct reaction to the sexual revolution, hedonism, and excess associated with punk rock. In its simplest form, straight edge is a philosophy of staying clean and sober: meaning refraining from using alcohol, tobacco, and any other recreational drugs. For some, this extends to not engaging in promiscuous sex, following a vegetarian or vegan diet, and not using caffiene or prescription drugs”
If this is the right thing then i think it’s quite admiral of people to want be this way, but personally i think it’s a bit to extreme.. i supposed it’s a good thing in the sense that alcoholism and drug use wouldn’t be so much of a problem - but to not use things like prescription drugs is a bit to far, if your ill and you need medication, then you need it

Day 11 – What do you think about prostitution? Should it be legal?

I think its sad. I think for a woman or a man to feel like they have no other talent or ambition to go and find another job is sad. I think that alot of people that turn to prostitution have issues from their past that have made them feel like they are worthless and that the only thing good about them is what they can do for others. I think it robs them of so much...it robs them of self worth, of having an intimate relationship with anyone and it robs them of knowing that your body is something God gave you to share with one person. I do not think it should be legal. I think that this world with all of its lust and porn has taken sex and made it something evil.

Day 12 – What do you think about bisexuality?

I dont really think about it honestly. I have always said every woman has a little lesbian in them but, for the most part I think its mostly to get attention from men. I do believe and can only speak for myself that most woman can get turned on by other woman. All the woman I know if they are watching or looking at porn or sex or whatever we watch the girl more than the guy. I may just be speaking for myself here though. lol. No Im not lesbian or bi. I just think I say what alot of woman are scared to say. Woman are beautiful. I can appreciate that.



Day 13 – Do you think there should be an age to get tattoos/piercings without the consent of a parent?
That makes no sense.
There is an age that you can get tattoos/piercings without the consent of a parent - 18
I don’t think it should be any lower than that either, simply because when you’re young you make rash decision and sometimes do things out of spite - so if your parent turned round to you and said ‘you’re not having a tattoo’, you’d probably get one just to spite them and just because you can - and you’d probably end up regretting it.
Not only that, but young people change their minds so much, so having something tattoed on them which they can’t change would just end in disaster.

Day 14 – Do you believe in aliens?

No I dont

Day 15 – Do you believe in regrets? do you have any terrible ones?

No matter what people say, everyone has regrets - its just that some are more feeble than others, and some people let regrets rule them. At the end of the day, something positive always comes from regretting something because you learn from the mistake you made.
I have some regrets that I think are terrible but, they lead me to be the girl that I am today!


Day 16 – What do you want to happen to your body when you die?

DO NOT put me in a hurse (sp) and other than that do as you will. Im gonna be in heaven!!

Day 17 – Have you experienced your ‘first true love’ yet? Do you believe you ever will?
To me, true love is that old couple sitting on a bench holding hands and looking as happy as they did when they were first together. To me, the only way you’d be able to refer to someone as your true love is if they were the one you chose to spend your life with, and actually spent your life with them. I have found love a few times but, it obviously wasnt my true forever love or I wouldnt be explaining all of this.

Day 18 – What is your take on people who self harm (cutting, burning, scratching etc etc.)
Honestly, i think its stupid and dangerous and not only that i think when people are self-harm themselves, they are crying out for help - To physical hurt yourself in such a severe way just screams out to me that the person is struggling and really needs help, because i’m pretty sure you wouldn’t just do it for shits and giggles - if you do then that it seriously messed up.


Day 19 – Do you think high schools should give out free contraceptive?
I’m 50/50 about this one, simply because by giving it away it’s like encouraging them to have sex, when in high school they are still really young but at the same time by not giving it them, is encouraging them to be un-safe. Plus, in this day and age that many young people are becoming pregnant so it probably would be a good idea to give it out at high schools. I just wish the parents would take care of these things at home. I hate the " Im not giving them permission to go out and have sex" excuse. Hello, remember back to when you were in high school, did you need permission? Kids dont ask for permission to have sex they just do it. With or without protection because they are kids. They are stupid and fearless and reckless and they think nothing can happen to them. And yes, I agree that if they are all these things they shouldnt be having sex but, its not up to us anymore. As parents you protect and EDUCATE your children about sex but, you dont just ignore or excuse yourself from being the responsible one because at the end of the day regardless of anything else its your child and your responsibility!

Day 20 – What do you think about plastic surgery?

I think plastic surgery should just be a part of child birth. I think if a woman sacrifices her body to have a baby that a boob lift,lypo and a tummy tuck should be included in the care plan for after the baby is born.

However, for woman who go overboard and spend 500k to look like a totally different person that ridiculous and there should be a limit to how extreme a person is allowed to go.

Day 21 – What do you think about the death penalty?
Honestly, i think it’s the stupidest idea ever.
If somebody has committed a crime, and done something seriously awful; like murdered, or raped someone and all those kinda crimes… Killing them for it, in my opinion is just giving them the easy way out.
They should be made to suffer, so that they understand what they did was not only wrong but inhumane. These days when people are put into prison they have games rooms, gyms and all sorts of luxuries - which if you ask me doesn’t exactly help much when they are supposed to be being punished for what they’ve done.
They should be left to suffer and rot in a small dingy little cell. Otherwise how will they learn that what they did is wrong, and unacceptable.
Another reason, i don’t like the death penalty is that if someone is falsely accused and they are put to death for something they didnt do, you can’t change that, and an innocent man/woman will have been killed.

Day 22 – Do you say your country’s national anthem/pledge of allegiance when it is said/listened to?
I do




-Incase you want to do this challenge yourself, here it is :)-
Day 1 – Do you believe in God?/What religion are you?
Day 2 – Do you believe in an afterlife? What do you believe happens when you die?
Day 3 – Are you proud to be from whatever country you are from?
Day 4 – What is your view on gay marriage?
Day 5 – Do you think sex before marriage is okay?
Day 6 – What are your views on love? Do you think it’s real? Do you think we only experience one love per lifetime? Does everyone have a soul mate?
Day 7 – Do you want to get married and/or have kids?
Day 8 – Do you think any drugs should be legalized? Do you think there should be an age for drinking?
Day 9 – Pro-life or prochoice?
Day 10 – What do you think about straightxedge?
Day 11 – What do you think about prostitution? Should it be legal?
Day 12 – What do you think about bisexuality?
Day 13 – Do you think there should be an age to get tattoos/piercings without the consent of a parent?
Day 14 – Do you believe in aliens?
Day 15 – Do you believe in regrets? do you have any terrible ones?
Day 16 – What do you want to happen to your body when you die?
Day 17 – Have you experienced your ‘first true love’ yet? Do you believe you ever will?
Day 18 – What is your take on people who self harm (cutting, burning, scratching etc etc.)
Day 19 – Do you think high schools should give out free contraceptive?
Day 20 – What do you think about plastic surgery?
Day 21 – What do you think about the death penalty?
Day 22 – Do you say your country’s national anthem/pledge of allegiance when it is said/listened to?

The last post for this challenge and the hardest one...ONE CONFESSION

Im one confused child:

So confused that I ? everything I am and what I stand for. I ? everyones loyalty and love for me and I ? everyones motives..So apparently Im not only confused but, paranoid too. Im pretty sure I dont know my head from a hole in the ground and its driving me crazy! Im on a mission to find that girl who knows what she wants without a doubt and I dont intend on letting anyone in my head to twist and turn the way I think. Im on a mission to know me again and to never lose myself in another person again. I want to be me regardless of who comes and goes in my life and I dont intend on allowing others to change the way that I am. But, for now I dont know if the way I think is my own thinking or if I have just borrowed the opinions of others and made them my own. I feel like I have been talked into circles and now Im like a lil girl who twirled herself around in circles 300 times and is doing the drunk walk and stammer trying to make the world stop spinning. Im the dizzy confused girl! I hate to admit it but, I am she!

3 turn ons

1. First of all that picture turns me on...lol but, really lets see...good kisser

2. nice arms and chest

3. aqua di gio cologne...